I really didn't think I’d be interested 
Things are just too complicated right now
Even more than last year 
And the one before that
I need to be prepared for what 
Lies ahead
On the collective plane of being 
Not my own 
So I should just keep things simple 
Be mindful of my own energy
It is not completely recovered you know  
Replenishing is still a pretty 
Difficult task
After the sapping of the everyday 
Wear and tear
But you quite artfully managed to 
Bring back 
An old handsome dream of my youth
A more conventional world-fitting one
But still a dream
Of growth and nourishing fulfillment 
At the forefront of life 
Of freedom to create
Closer to matter of course 
Like hardy clay pots instead of just
Cute adornments
Of questionable use to some 
My 20 year-old self kept looking at this all 
Starry-eyed
Remembering the enthusiasm of the beginning
The hope of becoming
Before the weighing-down of being 
So it seemed like a chance 
To go back in time 
And give it another go
Hoping to close the gap between 
Two streams of the same 
Divine origin 
But this was only one side 
Of the temptation
The other one I think
Increasingly more seductive 
The enchanting promise of going 
Back to how things were 
Or could have been
When people lived their lives in peace 
To the best of their ability at least 
When they walked the streets mask-free
And hopefully took deep breaths 
Of the crisp winter air
Greedily 
Stocking up in advance
When hiding your face from
Strangers in the metro  
Could be just a choice or even 
An occasional whim
That actually took some effort and skill
And you were still allowed the thrill
Of locking onto a face 
Sometimes under the pretense
Of an absent stare  
When after a walk in the cold
You could rejoice in the childlike anticipation
Of a piping-hot cup of coffee 
Someplace nice 
Inside not just on a bench 
In the park
When anyone could enter a bookstore
For the sheer pleasure of it 
Just to see what else is new
And peruse the shelves at will
Without the discomfort of breaking 
Some ludicrous rule

(2022)

Sursă foto: Unsplash.com

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